rattling loose change

in my pants pockets

staring down the gray

street and the white

street lights and the

  | what is any of this |

when you touch things

why do you remain you

and it remain it

why do you not become

the same thing?

some feedback on my brain speakers

the wind rattles against

old window panes across

the street and i am staring at them

atoms are mostly comprised of nothing

—what makes you then?

air? particulate matter?

in a vacuum why

doesn't your body

evaporate as space

sucks the air out

of youratoms

like a hungry vampire

why is gravity so strong

in large objects

and nuclear force so strong

in tiny objects

what is the strong middle force

that binds my soul

to my body; is that empathy?

there’s a rooster crowing in the

neighborhood despite the city codes

against it—perhaps i am walking

to find it

so i can murder it

why do i cry because i can’t do the dishes

why when i stare up at skyscrapers

am i filled with an inexplicable awe

at the majesty of human creation

why do i want to fuck so bad

why can’t i stop eating dumb food

you’re telling me its chemicals

in my brain

and they are not working right?

you’re telling me the crux of

humankind is anchored in the

flow of chemicals?

that we are human because of chemicals
?

.

.

.

what chemicals make me a wombat

.

.

.

the sky ends as a livid lover

having fed you

warmed you

brightened you

all these hours

and not once

did you ever look up at her.

jcb