the decemberists adventure!

Finally, something interesting happens with my life, which means I can update my blog.  I feel bad, because my last blog was harping on Portlanders, calling them “two-dimensional.”  I should say some Portlanders are two-dimensional.  It was all tongue-in-cheek to begin with, I swear!

Anyway, this past weekend was, since Musicfest all the way back in September, my favorite weekend that I’ve had since moving to Portland.  Why was it my favorite weekend since moving here, you ask?  Because I got to see the Decemberists play twice, AND I GOT A BACKSTAGE PASS.

Read on, reader. Continue reading

things that have happened

Some things that have happened over the past few days:

- Went to Music Millennium to get my vinyl copy of the Decemberists’ The Hazards of Love signed by members of the band.  Very weird experience, especially after making this video/song in response to this tweet by Colin Meloy, the lead singer.  I couldn’t look him in the eyes for fear of catching a glimpse of recognition … That’s the guy who did “Linda”?

- After signing, proceeded to get completely trashed with my /orate friends at Paul’s house.  Like, drunker than drunk.  I’ll put it this way: I puked.  For the first time since I was, oh, eleven.  I am not proud of this whatsoever.  In fact, it’s kind of infuriating.  It was partially because I am used to parties with Keystone Light1.  It’s not hard to pack away a few of those in a night and not feel anything.  But I was drinking good, strong beers, and I was drinking far too many of them. There is a video of us singing “The Rake’s Song” on YouTube but if you want to see it you’ll have to search it yourself, cause I sure as hell am not posting it.  Regardless, I am so drunk I’m on the floor, semi passed out. Ugh, it makes my stomach churn just thinking about it.  I had fun and I love my friends, but I refuse to be inebriated that much ever again (especially cause my dad reads my blog, for pete’s sake!).

- The next morning found me calling in sick to work2.  I slept at Paul’s mom’s house, which is in the wilds of Gresham, and besides I was hungover.  Now this would not have been a big deal whatsoever … except that my brother decided to head into the clinic that same day to get a check.  So the following conversation occured:

BRO. Hey Boss, I’m here to get a check!
BOSS. Hi Josh’s brother!  How’s Josh doing?
BRO. He’s great.
BOSS. GREAT, HUH?
BRO. Yeah, I mean, I guess he’s great ’cause he didn’t come home last night.
BOSS. EGADS!

Meanwhile I’m at the Tin Shed on Alberta trying to determine if I really want to eat biscuits and gravy3.  When I went to work the next morning I wasn’t sure if everyone knew I played “hooky”4.  This made the bus ride rather worrisome — would I be tested?  Tricked with questions created to deceive?  Led astray by the same people who hired me?

Instead I found out that no one else knew besides my boss, and she gave me lighthearted shit about it all day long.  God I love my job so much5.

- This past weekend I traveled back to Boise, just to hang out and see my friends and family for a bit.  It was a lot of fun, and a lot of really interesting things came from it.  I saw a Snuggie for the first time ever.  I wore said Snuggie, complete with a wig.  I drank a lot.  I also found out that I am an idiot and should’ve pursued a particular woman in the past, rather than shrinking back and being a socially awkward nerd.  I couldn’t help it (at the time); I was broke and felt like a loser.  Now I don’t feel like a loser at all but I am in Portland and she is in Boise.  Ugh, it’s always something, isn’t it?

So, uh, if you’re reading this, dear lady, you know who you are and maybe you should move to Portland?  That would be awesome? kthxbai

- Oh, and recently I released a free single that you can download.  It’s called “Mary! (Get Frisky!)” and you can grab it from my other website.  Here is a picture that you can click that will help guide you to a favorable destination:


- OH AND MY DAD HAS A BLOG!  He is the coolest.  Check it out!  http://rockinjohnnyb.blogspot.com

Okay that’s all! Hooray!

  1. Or other cheap, watery beers.
  2. Obviously.
  3. I did. They were delicious.
  4. I put quotes around that because I technically did not — I really was sick. Just not with a cold or the flu.
  5. Though I will, of course, not play hooky again.  Ever.  Never ever.

some blurry camera photos from okkervil river

Christina, who most of you know as Paul’s friend/the driver for  most of our MFNW weekend, was very pukey sick yesterday, and couldn’t make it to to the Okkervil River concert.  Paul, being the awesome guy that he is, gave me that ticket.  So, in a way, Christina’s loss was not in vain — the show was one of the best I’ve been to.
The lineup was Zykos, Sea Wolf, and Okkervil.  Zykos was too full of themselves for me to enjoy.  They were the kind of band that plays more for themselves than for the audience, who are the first people you should play for, no exceptions.  I hate bands who say they don’t write songs for their audience, or who “don’t care” about their fans.  We’re the ones listening to your damn music!  Don’t say that!
Anyway, they were lukewarm, but they were the opener opener, so what can you say.
Up next was Sea Wolf.  They were much better than Zykos.

The Sea Wolf lineup.  They were having some kind of technical difficulties, but they sounded great and their songs were downright awesome.  Plus I want to marry their celloist.  She was cute and was wearing a plaid dress.  They had to cut their set short because, well, they weren’t paying attention to how long their set was, so that kind of sucked, but it was good music anyway.

Then came Okkervil River.
I didn’t know what to expect coming in, but their set was flawless and extremely exciting.  They put on a good show and everyone in the audience loved them.  Paul and I had gotten to the floor by the beginning of Sea Wolf’s set and were decently close (this was in the all-ages section, not the 21+ section), and I am always tall enough to get a great look at the stage.  Sorry people behind me.
The set went from great to greater to holy shit this is awesome.  Will Sheff has an undescribable charisma on stage.   I really don’t understand it, other than, unlike Zykos, he knows his fanbase and knows that he is singing songs to people and he was having a great time doing it.

Sheff singing alone in a spotlight he personally requested.

The rest of his band was somewhat motley, I thought.  A lot of older musicians, which I liked.  The drummer was annoying me, only because he looked like he was fifty but acted like he was in Def Leppard or someshit.  He kept twirling his drumstick through his fingers and I was like, “Yeah, I get it, you can do that.  Great.”  The multi-instrumentalist, Lauren, I think is her name, was great.  She could really shred, and let’s be honest, it’s fuckin hot when a girl can shred.  The trumpet player was great, the bassist played with his thumb, which I thought was really weird (and has a great voice; “Lost Coastlines” was fantastic), and their keyboardist looked too old to be in the group, haha.  But it was a great show overall.

They played all the hits (Unless Its Kicks, of course), and some Black Sheep Boy and A Girl in Port started it off and it was great.  Plus I met another /orator, maarvi, who is going to college here.  She was cool, though we met only briefly.
And that’s all!  Good show.

musicfest, northwest!: day two

Yesterday was, in some ways, more successful than Wednesday, as yesterday we got to see Del. And that’s the coolest thing ever. We lost Paul for most of the day because he was playing in a softball game, which meant it was just Missy and me. I had to be Primary Navigator, which is never, ever good. And since the Wonder Ballroom, our first location, was not downtown whatsoever, I was a little worried about how the hell we were going to get there. I have a terrible sense of direction, thanks to the almost non-existent bus system in Boise and the fact that downtown there is about four blocks total. Paul supplied us with directions and buses to take, though, and they were spot on, so thanks for that, Paul!

The Wonder was giving out free ice cream, which was bad ass. It also had this sectioned off VIP area with some cool hipster kids doing their thing (you know, looking generally apathetic). There was no line when we got there (around 5:30) so we walked in and the first band, No Age, was just beginning.

No Age is a two piece band, Randy on guitar and Dean on drums. Their songs would generally start like this: first, they would ask us if we were doing alright, a typical staple of most bands; then, they would make some horrendous noise with their guitar or drums or some kind of noise making device; after that, they would launch into an indiscernible song that was loud, punkish, and completely unlike the noise they were making earlier. The song would be two minutes long, then it would be abruptly over, and I would turn to Missy and say, “I wouldn’t be opposed it we got food right now.” No Age has gotten a lot of good press recently, but I think I’m too old to enjoy loud, annoying punk rock. I’ve got no particular angst right now, you know?

So we went to the Russell St Bar-B-Cue, which was recommended to us by Paul, and where we ate fried chicken that was approximately the size of my head. Seriously. I’ll have to make Missy send me the picture she took, but that thing was huge. And we got two sides and cornbread. Needless to say, we couldn’t finish it. There was an awkward point when Missy was outside smoking and the waiter came up to me and asked if I wanted boxes. I knew we didn’t need boxes, because we wouldn’t be able to take it into the Wonder, but for some reason my mouth said Yes, so we got boxes. We hauled our chicken into these boxes, paid, and promptly threw them away. I feel bad, but at the same time, that was too much chicken.

The line was forming for Battles, a pretty badass band of four dudes who were fed up with the typical musical structures and decided to make amazing songs with vocal samples and egregiously awesome drum beats and odd time signatures, etc etc etc. I like to call them a “futuristic tribal” band. Their percussion is so steady and repetitive that it sounds like something you’d hear in some African tribal dance, but the guitars and Tyondai’s weird vocal samples, where he would pitch shift his voice up an octave or two give it a distinctly futuristic, if not weird, feel.

So long story short, it was a loud, and awesome, set. I’ve never seen four men get so sweaty before (well, unless you count my old college days …). John Stanier, their drummer, receives special accolades for his amazing beat skills, his ability to change the time signature almost on a whim, and to start beats in what you would assume is the middle of the phrase. He looked exhausted as he played, but it was fantastic. Tyondai’s shirt started out white and ended up a dark beige as it became increasingly covered in sweat. Their songs were layered and amazing, and “Atlas” is as great live as it is on the album. All in all, I’m so glad I watched that set. I almost didn’t, but it was totally worth it.

After Battles Missy and I had a battle of our own: to try and make it back downtown. Once again, Paul had given us directions and proper buses, but in the end I fucked it up, as I am wont to do. It wasn’t terrible though, just a wrong stop on the bus, the need to take the MAX, and then some walking, at first in the wrong direction, then in the right. We had to get to the Roseland to see the Cool Kids and Del tha Funkee Homosapien!

First, though, we went to Berbati’s and listened to Love as Laughter. We weren’t feeling them that much, so we left at 9:30 for the walk to the Roseland, which is when I got a little lost and started walking south when I should’ve been walking north. We got there, though, and with plenty of time. There was a metal detector! I’ve never been to a show with a metal detector before. And a guy frisked me, and he felt my keys a little too sensually. So I gave him my number.

The Roseland is a great venue with a fairly large stage and a balcony where the 21+ kids go to sit and drink. My license is still expired, and they were scanning IDs at the lounge (probably to find felons or something), so I didn’t risk the balcony. Instead Missy and I went onto the floor and hung out.

Apparently the Roseland had been doing DJ and hip hop all night long. The Cool Kids came out when we got there. They were pretty good, nothing exceptional, but definitely fun and full of energy. The two guys have different pitched voices, which made their “harmonies” when they rapped together really cool. Their set was only about a half an hour long, which I thought was odd.

Afterward, some hype guy named Bookoo (or however he decided to spell it) came out and rapped a bit, and he was alright.

But then, then!, then Del tha Funkee Homosapien came out with A-Plus and the DJ whose name I cannot remember, and it was awesome. Del’s set included “Virus” from Deltron 3030 and “Mistadobolina” from his first album, AND “Clint Eastwood”, which I’m pretty sure featured new or different verses than the Gorillaz version. I’d bet that he brought out all the hits because the crowd was 3/4ths hipster white kids who only want to hear the hits, but I would’ve given my right arm to hear “Memory Loss” (my favorite Del track) or anything from Handsome Boy Modeling School. By the beginning of his set I smelt the familiar whiff of pot circulating through the room, and by the end of the set there were two opposing dance groups on each side of the floor. It was great. It was my first hip hop live show and I can’t wait to see more.

The second night of MFNW was a huge success, and tonight and tomorrow night are sure to be even bigger and better! I’ll keep you updated.

musicfest, northwest!: day one

It’s incredibly beautiful and sunny out in Portland today, as it has been the last couple of days, and the weather couldn’t be better for MFNW. First, I am very grateful to Paul and Missy from /orate for being kind enough to get me into the whole festival in the first place, being a poor, recently-transported son of a bitch. This was technically my third time ever meeting anyone from the internet, though the first time doesn’t count cause she lived in Boise too. These kinds of meetings always start off weird, but Paul and Missy are very cool and not crazy or weird at all. I think that stigma of internet people being strange and/or socially inept is starting to wane, as it should, since everyone uses the internet these days, and we can’t all be socially inept, right?

Wednesday night was pretty low-key, being the start of the fest and all. After getting a quick bite and wandering around town, doing typical touristy things (Powells, of course), we descended upon Berbati’s (“descended upon” is a literary critic way of describing getting somewhere. never will they say “we walked to Berbati’s”, instead they will say, “we found ourselves in the midst of Berbati’s” or “after dinner we slowly hovered on the wings of angels to Berbati’s,” etc) and waited for the bands to play.

Okay, the bands.

First were The 1900s, who are from Chicago. They were an excellent start off to the night, a good, jangly three-minute pop band with seven members stuffed onto the relatively small stage. They have two female vocalists (i’ll get to them in a second) and one male vocalist who plays guitar and everyone did their job very well. Their sound was tight and crisp and I found myself bobbing my head to most of their song (hipsters, as you well know, are not allowed to dance, with the sole exception of “that girl”, who dances like a maniac by herself in a small circle of room she carves out with wildly flailing arms whose movements are dictated by the amount of ecstacy she has ingested prior to the show).

We were standing beside and slightly behind the stage, which was great because it meant not getting the full blast of the speakers, and also because I could stare at Jeanine O’Toole’s ass all during the set. The 1900s are a seven-piece band (though there’s another girl in the picture I’ve posted … the one on the far left, I don’t know who she is), and three of them are women. Jeanine (girl at the top of that picture) was wearing a halter top and high-rise jeans, a throwback to the 60s, and she was hot. And totally into the music, which is also hot. Anyway, my point is, Jeanine, if you ever read this blog, I think it would be great if we got married. That’s all. Simple ceremony, maybe in my backyard, some friends, cheap beers, that sort of thing. Think about it.

Did Missy get a setlist? Yes.

The second band was Norfolk & Western, which I’ve never been a huge fan of but they pulled off a great set last night. Some of you might know that N&W’s drummer, Rachel (right of the guy in the middle, Adam), used to be the drummer for the Decemberists, but her boyfriend is in Norfolk, so obviously she chose them over the D’s, which is fine. I didn’t like them before because their songs were kind of slow and I just didn’t get into it, but last night they were a little more upbeat, a little more rocking, and Rachel kicked the shit out of those drums. Seriously, I saw shit flying right out of the bass drum, hitting the audience and making them cry out in disgust. She later apologized.

N&W was a four piece last night, with the bassist and keyboardist switching roles almost every other song. Sometimes one would play guitar, too. It was pretty cool, each guy utilizing his own experience with each instrument for each song. Overall, they won me over with a strong setlist.

Did Missy get a setlist? Yes.

We unfortunately had to miss the Old 97s because we had to catch the MAX back home, so our last show of the night was Langhorne Slim. Now, I had never heard of this band before in my life, which just goes to show how un-cool and un-hipster I am (I think I was the only person in the entire room wearing shorts — it was hot that day! I am a warm person!), and Paul was super excited to see him, and I was thinking, “Oh boy, this is going to be one of those soft folk picker types, and I’ll have to sit through five minute songs about the plight of the narwhal.”

Further from the truth.

The bass player, Paul, looked like a frat boy yet played an upright bass, the drummer, Malachi, was approximately 98% too cool for school, and the lead singer, Sean, wore a golfer cap and slightly nautical looking pants, and the crowd went wild, and they started playing and it was like a more Americana Flogging Molly, and it was awesome. Langhorne Slim is a lot more diverse, musically, than Flogging Molly, which made it a whole lot nicer. The energy was 110%, loud and raucous, each song two minutes or so, except for a couple of songs stretched or medley’d together. There wasn’t one dull moment in the entire show. Their set was short (they even had to play an extra song at the end) but it was intense and amazing. I’m glad I saw them.

Did Missy get a setlist? No, cause they didn’t have one.

Overall, day one was a success, a lot of fun, and especially good to hang out with people who were very cool and tons of fun. This weekend should be a blast.